“Mom, there’s something I have to tell you.” Ula’s eyes were wide with distress (苦惱) as she spoke to me.“What is it, sweetie?” I reached over and pushed her hair behind her ear.
“I know we weren’t supposed to do it,” she began, before telling me she’d been playing with one of her friends. The friend had wanted to practice the CPR ( 心肺復(fù)蘇術(shù)) they had learned in swimming class on her. Ula started to cry. “I told her I didn’t want to do it. But she really wanted to, and I didn’t want to make her mad.” I sent a note to the other girl’s parents so they could talk to their daughter.
But something Ula had said disturbed me: “I told her I didn’t want to do it. But she really wanted to, and I didn’t want to make her mad.”
Ula knew that what the other kid wanted to do wasn’t right. But she didn’t stand up for herself, and that frightened me. For the rest of the day, Ula and I talked about boundaries that help us, when necessary, to see to (處理) our needs before the needs of others.
Boundaries can protect us from being overworked; they can protect our belongings or health. Sometimes, they simply buy us the time to be alone or with a friend, away from the chaos ( 混 亂 ) of life, to rest and enjoy ourselves. Ula and I imagined different friends in different situations, crying and threatening to tell on her, and I taught her to say “no”, even in these situations.
I told her that I trust her to do what is right, no matter how angry that may make someone. And I told her that I will always be there to back her up. Now, Ula realizes that it doesn’t matter if we’re 7 or 47: Learning to protect our personal boundaries is a never-ending study, filled with errors in judgment.
With each day of our lives, we have to learn where the line is. We have to decide whether and how, on that day, we will defend it.
I stayed with Ula until she said, “You need to go eat.” And in that moment, she reminded me of the next great lesson in boundaries: It’s not enough to look out for our own limits – we must also honor them in others.
1.After hearing Ula’s story, the writer felt worried mainly because________.
A.Ula’s friend had a bad influence on her
B.there was something wrong with Ula’s heart
C.Ula had trouble getting on with her friend
D.Ula couldn’t’ say no to people’ s requests
2.From the article, the most important thing that boundaries help us to do is________.
A.to protect our friends
B.to follow our heart
C.to make both ourselves and our friends happier
D.to enjoy more time alone and away from chaos
3.What is the writer’s advice when her daughter is asked to do what she dislikes?
A.Talking with her friends about how she truly feels.
B.Refusing her friends’ requests as long as they don’t get angry.
C.Speaking to her friends’ parents when she feels frightened.
D.Saying no to her friends even though they may feel angry.
4.Which of the following would the writer agree with?
A.We should respect others’ limits while protecting our own.
B.We should try our best to put our needs before others’ needs.
C.Boundaries are more important for children than for adults.
D.People who don’t care about our feelings are unworthy of our friendship.
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