【題目】【寫作要求】“雙十一”現(xiàn)在已經(jīng)成為購物的節(jié)日，在這天，人們紛紛在網(wǎng)上購物，尋找自己喜愛的商品。以下是關于“雙十一”的來源和發(fā)展，請就此寫一篇100字左右的短文。

【寫作內(nèi)容】

起源

起源于20世紀90年代南京的部分大學。

日期

每年的11月11日，所以在中國又被稱為“光棍節(jié)”

慶祝方式

年輕人舉行各種聚會，并尋找自己心愛的人

發(fā)展

2011年起，“雙十一”開始成為電子商務的標志。在那天，人們可以用很便宜的價格在網(wǎng)上購買喜歡的產(chǎn)品

存在的問題

人們花錢買很多自己并不需要的商品，或者買到價高質次的商品。投訴增多，增加煩惱

你的建議

雙十一購物給消費者帶來便利，但是購買時應該理性，要選擇有信譽的商店并購買需要的商品, 以防被騙

參考詞匯： 光棍節(jié)：Singles Day 電子商務：E-commerce

【答案】

Double 11, originating from some universities in Nanjing in the 1990s, is called Singles Day in China because it falls on Nov.11 by coincidence when many young people will hold many parties to look for the one they love. Since 2011, Double 11 has become the symbol of E-commerce, when people can buy lots of things they like at a low price. But, at the same time, people might buy some products they don’t need at all or buy something with a high price but in low quality. What’s worse, there are always lots of complaints and they may therefore get annoyed for this. In my opinion, though shopping online on that day brings consumers a lot of convenience, they should be reasonable and buy in the shop with a good reputation in case of being cheated.

【解析】

試題分析：本篇書面表達屬于說明文，根據(jù)提示信息說明來介紹“雙十一”的來源發(fā)展。寫作時注意以下幾點：1、仔細閱讀有關提示，弄清試題提供的所有信息，不可遺漏，同時明確要點；2、提綱是文章的總體框架，要在提綱的范圍內(nèi)進行分析構思；3、根據(jù)要表達的內(nèi)容確定句子的時態(tài)、語態(tài)，本文應該用一般現(xiàn)在時態(tài)；4、盡量使用一些高級句型和詞匯提升作文檔次；5、注意行文的連貫性盡量保持卷面整潔，字體美觀。

【亮點說明】1、文章脈絡結構清晰，整體框架嚴密。囊括了所有要點，展示了雙十一的發(fā)展歷程，條理清晰。2、運用較多高級短語，避免文章陷入平庸的分數(shù)段，如：falls on、with a high price but in low quality、get annoyed for、brings consumers a lot of convenience、a good reputation使文章更加生動，所以考生要在平時注重積累，爭取能把高級詞匯或者短語運用到自己的文章中去。3、變換句型，注重時態(tài)。如：現(xiàn)在分詞作定語,……originating from some universities in Nanjing in the 1990s。現(xiàn)在分詞作狀語though shopping online on that day brings consumers a lot of convenience，we……，給讀者耳目一新的感受，體現(xiàn)了作者高超的遣詞造句能力。全篇用一般現(xiàn)在時，同時在個別句子中運用了一般將來時，如when many young people will hold many parties使文章更有水平。

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