Question

6．假設(shè)你和你朋友在中山公園散步時(shí)遇到的一件事，請(qǐng)根據(jù)要求寫(xiě)一篇英語(yǔ)短文．
【寫(xiě)作內(nèi)容】
時(shí)間          上星期六下午
地點(diǎn)          在中山公園的湖邊
事件          我和朋友在散步，湖中一個(gè)小女孩在呼救．我們沒(méi)來(lái)得及脫衣服就跳進(jìn)湖中將她救上岸，對(duì)她做了人工呼吸，并在她恢復(fù)知覺(jué)后，送她去醫(yī)院．我們還打電話(huà)通知她的家長(zhǎng)．最終小女孩得救了．
評(píng)價(jià)          家長(zhǎng)很感激，醫(yī)生對(duì)我們的急救給予高度評(píng)價(jià)．
感受          懂得急救只是很重要．
參考詞匯：急救 first aid
【寫(xiě)作要求】
只能使用5個(gè)句子表達(dá)全部的內(nèi)容．
【評(píng)分標(biāo)準(zhǔn)】
結(jié)構(gòu)準(zhǔn)確、內(nèi)容完整和篇章連貫．  _____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Answer 1

分析 高分句型：
句型一：
 Last Saturday afternoon，my friend and I were walking by the lake in Zhongshan Park when （1）suddenly we heard a girl calling（2）for help in the lake．上周星期天下午我和朋友正在中山公園湖邊散步這時(shí)突然聽(tīng)到一個(gè)女孩在湖里的求救．
（1）when并列連詞"這時(shí)"，為了引起注意，常常與過(guò)去進(jìn)行時(shí)、過(guò)去完成時(shí)或was/were about to 連用；
（2）hear sb．doing 聽(tīng)見(jiàn)某人在做…
句型二：
Her parents were very thankful to us and the doctors thought highly of（1）our first aid，which（2）made us realize that knowing first aid is of significance（3）for everyone．她的父母非常感謝我們，醫(yī)生高度評(píng)價(jià)了我們的急救，這使我們意識(shí)到對(duì)每個(gè)人來(lái)講懂得急救非常重要．
（1）think highly of高度評(píng)價(jià)
（2）which引導(dǎo)了非限制性定語(yǔ)從句，指代整個(gè)主句，只能放在主句之后．
（3）be of significnce=be significant重要；"of+抽象名詞"可以替換相應(yīng)的形容詞；在書(shū)面表達(dá)中用短語(yǔ)替換常用詞也是增加亮點(diǎn)的一個(gè)方法．

解答 Last Saturday afternoon，my friend and I were walking by the lake in Zhongshan Park when suddenly we heard a girl calling for help in the lake【高分句型一】（時(shí)間和地點(diǎn)）．We hurriedly jumped into the lake without taking off our clothes，swam towards her and pulled her out．Then we made her breathe using mouth-to-mouth way before she came to herself，sent her to hospital and telephoned her parents．Afterwards，we were told that the girl was saved because of the timely rescue（事件的過(guò)程）．
Her parents were very thankful to us and the doctors thought highly of our first aid（評(píng)價(jià)），which made us realize that knowing first aid is very important for everyone【高分句型二】（感受）．

點(diǎn)評(píng) 寫(xiě)作時(shí)首先審題要到位：審體裁、人稱(chēng)和時(shí)態(tài)；審要點(diǎn)．其次要考慮高分詞語(yǔ)和句型的選用，從句、非謂語(yǔ)動(dòng)詞、倒裝、強(qiáng)調(diào)句型等都是可考慮的高級(jí)句型；詞語(yǔ)和句型的選用要包含作者的感情色彩和增強(qiáng)表達(dá)的氣勢(shì)；再次，運(yùn)用關(guān)聯(lián)詞如besides、what's  more、moreover、for one thing …for another等，使文字更加流暢．