Question

假如你是我市一名高三學(xué)生李華，你打算報考一所外語學(xué)院。你在網(wǎng)絡(luò)上看到上海外國語學(xué)院的招生信息(admission information)，并對此非常感興趣。根據(jù)招生要求，你需要用英語撰寫一份個人申請報告，內(nèi)容應(yīng)包括：
1．記述自己的個性特長及取得的成果；
2．說明進入大學(xué)后的努力方向及設(shè)想等。
注意：1.詞數(shù)：120 -150；開頭與結(jié)尾已經(jīng)給出，不計人總詞數(shù)。
2．可適當(dāng)增加細節(jié)，以使行文連貫。
Dear Sir or Madam,
I'm writing to apply to study in your university.
_______________________________________________________________________________
_______________________________________________________________________________
_______________________________________________________________________________
I'm looking forward to hearing from you soon.
Yours．
Li Hua

Answer 1

Dear Sir or Madam,
I’m writing to apply to study in your university. I read about the admission information while surfing the net the other day. I’m really interested in it.
I’m an outgoing girl and I can get on well with all my classmates. I do well in most of my subjects, especially in English. I like reading English poems and enjoy English movies. Speeches delivered by famous people like Martin Luther. King, President Bush and so on, are also my favorite. I once won the first prize for English Speech Contest held in our city and was honored the Best Speaker for my excellence performances.
As we all know, English is a universal language and I like to communicate with different people, so I intend to major in English if I am admitted into your university. I want to have a job relating with languages in the future and I believe I can help promote cultural communication between China and the world.
I’m looking forward to hearing from you soon.
Yours,
Li Hua

試題分析：這是一篇提綱類書面表達，文章的要點也基本上都給出來了，但是不是很具體，考生要根據(jù)要點進行拓展發(fā)揮，不能有遺漏，內(nèi)容一定要充實，這就要求增加了難度。在寫作的過程中，要注意使用高級詞匯和高級句型，如強調(diào)句，倒裝句等，讓文章更上檔次。同時在列舉措施的時候要使用合適的連接詞如：First，second， Besides, What’s more等，讓文章看起來很有條理，也很流暢。本篇文章在寫作時不要啰嗦，力求簡潔。
【亮點說明】所給范文語言簡潔，運用了一些詞組和好的句子：get on well with和…相處好，intend to打算，major in主修，be admitted into被錄取， I read about the admission information while surfing the net the other day. 這句話用了省略句， Speeches delivered by famous people like Martin Luther. King, President Bush and so on, are also my favorite. I once won the first prize for English Speech Contest held in our city and was honored the Best Speaker for my excellence performances. 這兩句話用了過去分詞做定語， As we all know, English is a universal language and I like to communicate with different people, so I intend to major in English if I am admitted into your university.這句話用了非限制性定語從句， I want to have a job relating with languages in the future and I believe I can help promote cultural communication between China and the world. 這句話用了現(xiàn)在分詞做定語。