When you are at odds with someone close to you, the One-Minute Drill can show you how to express your feelings effectively – and how to listen more skillfully. All it requires is two individuals who are committed to improving their relationship.
Set aside at least ten minutes, and then sit facing each other. Decide who will be the Talker and who will be the Listener. It makes no difference, because later you will change roles.
How to perform the One-Minute Drill
For approximately 30 seconds, the Talker can say anything he or she wants. Your job will be to express your thoughts and feelings. You can discuss problems you've had a hard time talking about. Remember to limit yourself to about 30 seconds. When the Talker finishes, the Listener will summarize what the Talker just said, as well as how the Talker was feeling inside, as accurately as possible.
The Talker now gives the Listener a grade between 0 and 100 per cent to indicate how accurate the summary was. If the rating is 95 per cent or more, you can change roles; the new Talker can continue with the same topic or move on to something entirely new.
However, if the grade is below 95 per cent, the Talker should point out what the Listener missed or got wrong, and repeat the process until the overall rating is 95 per cent or more. Then you can change roles and repeat the exercise for as long as you both like.
How it works
Thirty seconds of emotionally charged information is sufficiently challenging for anyone. Express your feelings in strong, clear, direct language, but as your partner will be listening attentively, you won't need to shout, exaggerate or put your partner down.
The Listener should sit and listen respectfully without interrupting. Look into your partner's eyes, but avoid using negative body language. If you like, take a few notes.
So the Talker might say: "When I come home from work, I feel tired and I need some quiet time. But you tell me I'm supposed to spend time with the kids. This makes me feel frustrated. I work hard and I'm exhausted at the end of the day. I feel like I deserve a little time to relax, not listen to more demands."
In response, the Listener might summarize like this: "You just told me that you feel exhausted when you come home at night because you've been working hard all day. When I tell you I want you to spend time with the kids, you feel frustrated and ticked off because you're tired and you need time to relax. You see me as very demanding, and you're probably feeling like I don't appreciate you."
The first time you attempt the One-Minute Drill, you may get a low score. Don't worry, because you'll get up to speed quickly. Once you've tried this exercise a few times, you'll find that you can nearly always get ratings of 95 per cent or better on the first or second try.
【小題1】 Who is the One-Minute Drill intended for?
A.Those who are to act some roles in a certain play for the first time in their life. |
B.Those who are preparing for the interview in order to make a good first impression. |
C.Those who have difficulty communicating with their colleagues or family members. |
D.Those who have troubled relationships with their friends or family members and try to improve them. |
A.In the One-Minute Drill, the Talker and the Listener change roles in the process. |
B.The Talker should talk about his / her thoughts and feelings in a brief way. |
C.The Listener should listen carefully, respectfully and later summarize accurately. |
D.After the Talker finishes talking, the Listener is to give him / her a grade. |
A.husband and wife | B.father and son | C.mother and daughter | D.sister and brother |
A.fast asleep | B.very angry |
C.burst into tears | D.marked with a symbol |
科目:高中英語 來源: 題型:
—Can I drive on the free way, Mr. Green?
—You can when you____________ a bit more skilled.
A. will get B. are getting C. will have got D. get
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科目:高中英語 來源: 題型:
—Can I drive on the free way, Mr. Green?
—You can when you____________ a bit more skilled.
A. will get B. are getting C. will have got D. get
查看答案和解析>>
科目:高中英語 來源:2008年普通高等學校招生全國統(tǒng)一考試廣東卷英語試題 題型:閱讀理解
B
Sometimes you’ll hear people say that you can’t love others until you love yourself. Sometimes you’ll hear people say that you can’t expect someone else to love you until you love yourself. Either way, you’ve got to love yourself first and this can be tricky. Sure we all know that we’re the apple of our parents’ eyes, and that our Grandmas think we’re great talents and our Uncle Roberts think that we will go to the Olympics. but sometimes it’s a lot harder to think such nice thoughts about ourselves. If you find that believing in yourself is a challenge. it is time you build a positive self-image and learn to love yourself.
Self-image is your own mind’s picture of yourself. This image includes the way you look, the way you act, the way you talk and the way you think. Interestingly, our self-images are often quite different from the images others hold about US. Unfortunately, most of these images are more negative than they should be. Thus changing the way you think about yourself is the key to changing your self-image and your whole world.
The best way to defeat a passive self-image is to step back and decide to stress your successes. That is, make a list if you need to, but write down all of the great things you do every day. Don’t allow doubts to occur in it.
It very well might be that you are experiencing a negative self-image because you can’t move past one flaw or weakness that you see about yourself. Well, roll up your sleeves and make a change of it as your primary task. If you think you’re silly because you aren’t good at math, find a tutor. If you think you’re weak because you can’t run a mile, get to the track and practice. If you think you’re dull because you don’t wear the latest trends, buy a few new clothes. But remember, just because you think it doesn’t mean it’s true.
The best way to get rid of a negative serf-image is to realize that your image is far from objective, and to actively convince yourself of your positive qualities. Changing the way you think and working on those you need to improve will go a long way towards promoting a positive self-image. When you can pat(拍) yourself on the back, you’ll know you’re well on your way. Good luck!
【小題1】You need to build a positive self-image when you _________.
A.dare to challenge yourself | B.feel it hard to change yourself |
C.a(chǎn)re unconfident about yourself | D.have a high opinion of yourself |
A.have positive effects | B.a(chǎn)re probably untrue |
C.a(chǎn)re often changeable | D.have different functions |
A.To keep a different image of others. | B.To make your life successful. |
C.To understand your own world. | D.To change the way you think. |
A.How to prepare for your success. | B.How to face challenges in your life. |
C.How to build a positive self-image. | D.How to develop your good qualities. |
A.Parents. | B.Adolescents. | C.Educators. | D.People in general. |
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科目:高中英語 來源:2010-2011學年寧夏高三第三次月考英語卷 題型:閱讀理解
Sometimes you’ll hear people say that you can’t love others until you love yourself. Sometimes you’ll hear people say that you can’t expect someone else to love you until you love yourself. Either way, you’ve got to love yourself first and this can be tricky. Sure we all know that we’re the apple of our parents’ eyes, and that our Grandmas think we’re great talents and our Uncle Roberts think that we will go to the Olympics. But sometimes it’s a lot harder to think such nice thoughts about ourselves. If you find that believing in yourself is a challenge. It is time you build a positive self-image and learn to love yourself.
Self-image is your own mind’s picture of yourself. This image includes the way you look, the way you act, the way you talk and the way you think. Interestingly, our self-images are often quite different from the images others hold about US. Unfortunately, most of these images are more negative than they should be. Thus changing the way you think about yourself is the key to changing your self-image and your whole world.
The best way to defeat a passive self-image is to step back and decide to stress your successes. That is, make a list if you need to, but write down all of the great things you do every day. Don’t allow doubts to occur in it.
It very well might be that you are experiencing a negative self-image because you can’t move past one flaw or weakness that you see about yourself. Well, roll up your sleeves and make a change of it as your primary task. If you think you’re silly because you aren’t good at math, find a tutor. If you think you’re weak because you can’t run a mile, get to the track and practice. If you think you’re dull because you don’t wear the latest trends, buy a few new clothes. But remember, just because you think it doesn’t mean it’s true.
The best way to get rid of a negative self-image is to realize that your image is far from objective, and to actively convince yourself of your positive qualities. Changing the way you think and working on those you need to improve will go a long way towards promoting a positive self-image. When you can pat(拍)yourself on the back, you’ll know you’re well on your way. Good luck!
1.You need to build a positive self-image when you _________.
A. dare to challenge yourself B. feel it hard to change yourself
C. are unconfident about yourself D. have a high opinion of yourself
2. How should you change your self-image according to the passage?
A. To keep a different image of others. B. To make your life successful.
C. To understand your own world. D. To change the way you think.
3.What is the passage mainly about?
A. How to prepare for your success. B. How to face challenges in your life.
C. How to build a positive self-image. D. How to develop your good qualities.
4. Who are the intended readers of the passage?
A. Parents. B. Adolescents. C. Educators. D. People in general.
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科目:高中英語 來源:2010年高三備考英語“好題速遞”系列試題(6) 題型:單項填空
—Can I drive on the free way, Mr.Green?
—You can when you____________ a bit more skilled.
A.will get |
B.a(chǎn)re getting |
C.will have got |
D.get |
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